We are just joking around

​It is as clear in my head today as it was the day it happened.  I was crossing the parking lot with one of my students. He had several seizures when he was younger and was officially labeled “disabled”.  The seizures had wreaked havoc on both his mind and body, leaving him with the gait of someone who had lost use of the right side of his body. It was unusual and distinct. He didn’t need a label when you saw him walk you knew he was disabled.
Though there were too many instances in which he was ridiculed, mocked and/or discriminated against, a particular incident stays with me. While waiting for a school bus, I noticed a group of high school students making fun of this student, imitating the way he walked..
As an educator, I had seen this so often. It seemed that nothing was going to fix this, nothing was going to make those high school students understand how lucky they are. Not everyone wins the lottery of good health. Not everyone gets to take easy things for granted like walking, talking and learning.  As we walked by, I wanted to stop and explain how hurtful their actions were or how there was nothing to be scared of. I wanted them to know how kindness instead of humiliation can change the world. Instead, I reported them to their teacher. There was nothing else to do. Ridicule of people who are different is a common sport in our society and happens too often. A similar situation happened in which a group of full-grown adults started laughing and pointing as we got off the short bus.  And who hasn’t referenced the short bus in a joke?
How often does it happen that everybody in a store stops and openly stares because one student has Down Syndrome? It is constant. It is relentless and it is sad that it has become easier for me to remember the ridicule and humiliation of every taunt more than I can remember the times someone learned to read or get a job. The thing is this kind of disregard for human life and the  humiliation it breeds are pretty big emotions, ones that don’t ever go away. Moments like that burn themselves into your memory and those big negative emotions will always show up causing more pain all over again.
The reality of the act of mocking another person is to belittle another and shame any difference they may have And for what purpose? For 20 years I have stood next to many wonderful people as they were stared at and ridiculed. Funny thing is they never seemed to notice. The irony was and is that by humiliating another person for having disabilities, they only showcase what and who they really are.
As painful as it has been to watch, I remind myself that  “I can go home and leave this behind, they can’t”.  Even today I am still hoping for a society when my client’s hardships are not other people’s entertainment. I hope for a day when “just joking around” isn’t an excuse for bad behavior and a total lack of empathy. Imagine a world in which fellow humans did not mock but attempted to understand, care for, even guide, educate and employ people with disabilities? It is not an impossible dream it just not widespread enough to catch on yet. Maybe soon.